I Survived!

Finally, I decided to write about my stay in the hospital. It was after halloween and stayed there for 2 days. I mentioned in my previous entry that I am scheduled for a breast surgery. I guess, I didn’t feel scared anymore since I was in and out of this place for a month already. And being with my Mom all throughout the process made me worry less. We laugh at everything, so this made us actually forget that we were at the hospital.

Anyway, I got admitted, room 902. The room is huge. Well, thanks for my health insurance. Got my own tv, ref, cabinet, aircon and one huge bathroom. Not to mention the hot and cold shower. One thing, I’m a little disappointed was the bed. Its so small. Single-size bed and the foam is thin..

Right after we got our things in the room, nurses and doctors started coming in. Asking the same set of questions. I think, that was for 2hrs, different doctors, different nurses, asking the same questions. How am I doing? How am feeling? How’s my breast? Can I touch it? If I am going to think about it, I felt raped that day. Lol. Too many people touched my breast!! … then they finally stopped. 30mins, my room got quiet.

Then here comes another nurse and a doctor holding the dextrose!! Oh gosh! I was quiet. I guess that’s me when scared. The needle went into my nerve and I felt the immediate dose of the liquid coming from the tube. I was speechless. The doctor said, its done. I just looked at her and I felt tears in my face. She tapped me in my shoulder and that’s when I realized it’s over and that the nurse, my mom, my in-laws are all looking at me, wondering.. I was shocked. I didn’t know I was crying. Suddenly, my world stopped. The nerve hurts. The needle is hurting my hand. And from then on, I can’t move like I normally do since I have to be careful this time or else, I’ll be screaming in pain.

12 midnight, I started fasting. No food, no water. I thought, I will never ever gonna make it. But, surprisingly, I didn’t feel hungry or thirsty at all. Maybe its because of the dextrose. I didn’t know! haha! Sorry, the 1st time I had needle in my body was when I was 2yrs old.

Nov. 4, 2011. 11am. Here comes the nurse from the operating room pushing a wheel chair into my room. This is it. She had me wore a green lab gown and brought me to the operating room. The room is exactly the same as we see in movies. Full of medical equipment on both sides. 4-5 nurses checking on me, sterilizing the equipment. I can hear my heartbeats. The sound is scary because I can hear it goes really really fast and very slow.. What’s happening with my heart? Am I dying? Then my doctor came. That when I started to be scared again. The room is really cold and I can’t feel my hands anymore. They tied my legs and arms on the table. Just like Jesus in his cross.. Then the doctor said, they will be injecting the anethesia already and that I will be asleep. It took a little while before I lost my mind. But before that, I can clearly remember saying Angel of God prayer to the crucifix right in front of me, then closed my eyes.

I don’t have any idea what happened in the operating room. I woke up with the nurse asking me “ma’am, okay lang kayo? ma’am??” I just nodded. But I felt so dizzy and groggy. My eyes kept on closing but I kept on opening them. I remember, there was an old man in the bed right next to me. When I noticed him there, he was looking at me. He smiled. I asked him, what happened to him. He said, he got into an accident and that they needed to fix his knee. After that, he was brought back to his room. He said, “pagaling ka, iha, god bless..” I just smiled. I knew I wanted to talk, but not sure why there were no words came out of my mouth..

After another hour, the nurse started pulling my bed and said they will already bring me back to my room. Its a very humbling experience for me. Lying in bed, with dextrose, while people looking at me.. Someone I heard even said “kawawa naman, ang bata pa”. I felt tears in my face again..

Then we got back to my room. I saw my parents and my husband. I can never be happy. My mom hugged me. Everybody’s happy. I was thankful that I survived the surgery.. Thanks be to God..

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